Putting it simply, good things happen to people sometimes just by luck alone, without much effort, but not often. Is it likely that the first house you look at will turn out to be the house of your dreams? More likely you will have to look at fifteen or twenty houses before you decide to buy one.
If you look at one house every week or so, this process can take a long time.
But even then there must have been some choice involved.
Similarly, they have avoided getting their own feelings hurt when they were the one who was being rejected.
Some commonplace things seem to happen without special premeditation, effortlessly.
We grow up, find work, find someone to marry, have children and accomplish other such purposes without paying them much attention. Perhaps that is true for some people; but certainly not for everyone, and probably not for most.
Still, this arrangement worked out well enough for us to have showed up very many generations later. If the first half-dozen first dates are unsuccessful, it does not mean that you are unappealing or that you are too picky.
Unless you are extraordinarily lucky, the first ten or twenty people you meet—or thirty or forty—are not likely to constitute a good fit to you.